1
00:00:02,168 --> 00:00:04,104
The file cabinet
is jammed again.

2
00:00:04,137 --> 00:00:06,740
You know the drawer glides
shut nice and gentle,

3
00:00:06,773 --> 00:00:09,642
but you always close it like
you're King Kong or Godzilla.

4
00:00:09,743 --> 00:00:11,444
No, I don't.

5
00:00:11,444 --> 00:00:13,747
If I was King Kong,
I'd just shake it,

6
00:00:13,780 --> 00:00:16,449
and throw it out the window.

7
00:00:16,483 --> 00:00:18,418
Or if I was Godzilla,

8
00:00:18,451 --> 00:00:21,254
I'd just burn it, or
hit it with my tail.

9
00:00:21,287 --> 00:00:23,123
Just be more careful.

10
00:00:23,156 --> 00:00:27,160
Come to think of it, why
would either of them even
need a filing cabinet?

11
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:31,998
Hmm, that's better.

12
00:00:32,132 --> 00:00:34,134
Yeah.

13
00:00:35,668 --> 00:00:37,470
Oopsy.

14
00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:42,142
♪ You can tell me that
your dog ran away ♪

15
00:00:42,175 --> 00:00:45,812
♪ Then tell me that it
took three days ♪

16
00:00:45,845 --> 00:00:51,184
♪ I've heard every joke,
I've heard every one you say ♪

17
00:00:51,251 --> 00:00:55,188
♪ You think there's
not a lot goin' on ♪

18
00:00:55,288 --> 00:00:58,992
♪ Look closer, Baby,
you're so wrong ♪

19
00:00:59,025 --> 00:01:02,495
♪ And that's why you can
stay so long ♪

20
00:01:02,662 --> 00:01:06,800
♪ Where there's not a lot
goin' on ♪♪

21
00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:10,670
What's that stuff?

22
00:01:10,703 --> 00:01:12,806
It's one of those
new energy drinks.

23
00:01:12,839 --> 00:01:15,375
No, it's called Haywire.
Scamola.

24
00:01:15,508 --> 00:01:18,078
No. I mean all these energy
drinks are a scam,

25
00:01:18,211 --> 00:01:20,580
a total hose job,
and you fell for it.

26
00:01:20,713 --> 00:01:22,615
And look at this crap.

27
00:01:22,715 --> 00:01:25,752
Sodium citrate,
inositol phosphate.

28
00:01:25,819 --> 00:01:28,955
There's no scientific evidence
that any of this boosts energy.

29
00:01:29,055 --> 00:01:30,824
Yeah? Well, there's no
scientific evidence

30
00:01:30,857 --> 00:01:33,526
behind voodoo, either,
but go explain zombies.

31
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:40,333
There you are.

32
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:43,470
We've got tons of stuff
to do around here today.

33
00:01:43,536 --> 00:01:45,705
Eavestrough needs cleaning,
garden needs fertilizing.

34
00:01:45,738 --> 00:01:48,374
Sorry, not today.
I promised the school board

35
00:01:48,541 --> 00:01:50,777
I'd fill in for
the school bus driver.

36
00:01:50,844 --> 00:01:52,779
Why on earth would
they pick you?

37
00:01:52,846 --> 00:01:54,247
Oh, who knows.

38
00:01:54,347 --> 00:01:56,382
The bus driver,
Clarence, is sick.

39
00:01:56,416 --> 00:01:59,319
Here's a list of people
qualified to take his place.

40
00:01:59,352 --> 00:02:02,322
Here's another list of people
who aren't qualified at all.

41
00:02:02,355 --> 00:02:05,091
Now don't go mixing these up.

42
00:02:07,060 --> 00:02:10,563
Well, who am I supposed to
get to help me with the garden?

43
00:02:10,597 --> 00:02:14,267
Not my problem. I got
a school bus to drive.

44
00:02:15,535 --> 00:02:18,138
That was a lucky shot.
You hit my sciatic nerve.

45
00:02:18,271 --> 00:02:20,640
Your sciatic nerve
is in your jaw?

46
00:02:20,773 --> 00:02:22,375
They're all connected,
right, Brent?

47
00:02:22,408 --> 00:02:25,845
Your jaw and your hip are
connected, yes, via the torso.

48
00:02:25,879 --> 00:02:27,847
Somebody took biology
in high school.

49
00:02:27,881 --> 00:02:31,117
I took it 7 or 8 times.
What are you talkin' about?

50
00:02:31,284 --> 00:02:32,785
Ah, I don't want to say.

51
00:02:32,819 --> 00:02:35,455
It's kind of embarrassing,
for Davis.

52
00:02:35,488 --> 00:02:37,123
I'm not embarrassed.

53
00:02:37,257 --> 00:02:39,125
Anyone can get knocked out.

54
00:02:39,292 --> 00:02:42,962
Muhammad Ali got knocked out.
George Chuvalo got knocked out.

55
00:02:43,129 --> 00:02:45,098
Neither of them ever
got knocked out.

56
00:02:45,131 --> 00:02:48,601
Oh. Well, they both knocked out
other guys, tough guys.

57
00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:51,905
I barely touched him and
he dropped like a bag of sand.

58
00:02:51,938 --> 00:02:53,706
She used a wrench.

59
00:02:53,806 --> 00:02:57,443
So I can knock Davis
out whenever I want?
This is good to know.

60
00:02:57,577 --> 00:02:59,779
Why would you want
to knock me out?

61
00:02:59,812 --> 00:03:01,481
I have my reasons.

62
00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:04,317
You're drinkin' Haywire?
I thought you said
that was stupid.

63
00:03:04,350 --> 00:03:07,320
No, I said you were stupid.
I said this was fraudulent.

64
00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:09,322
But it's tasty.

65
00:03:16,596 --> 00:03:18,164
What is that, a sail?

66
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:19,899
No.

67
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:21,834
But that is a good idea.

68
00:03:22,602 --> 00:03:24,637
No, I'm in the
advertising business.

69
00:03:24,804 --> 00:03:25,638
Oh.

70
00:03:25,805 --> 00:03:27,173
It hit me last night,

71
00:03:27,307 --> 00:03:29,342
I should be in the
advertising business.

72
00:03:29,375 --> 00:03:32,045
Maybe 'cause I was watching a
Bewitched marathon on TV.

73
00:03:32,145 --> 00:03:34,380
Oh, right, because Darrin
was in advertising.

74
00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:37,350
No, I just really liked the way
they advertised the marathon.

75
00:03:37,450 --> 00:03:39,953
So, uh, that's why I have
this billboard--

76
00:03:39,986 --> 00:03:42,188
well, I'm callin' it
a Hankboard. Know why?

77
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:44,090
Your name's not Bill?

78
00:03:44,190 --> 00:03:46,025
Did I already tell ya that?

79
00:03:46,192 --> 00:03:48,161
Anyway, you can be
my first customer.

80
00:03:48,194 --> 00:03:50,663
I'll paint "The Ruby"
on it and drive around.

81
00:03:50,697 --> 00:03:52,465
And what's that
gonna cost me?

82
00:03:52,498 --> 00:03:54,167
500 bucks?

83
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:55,668
I don't think so.

84
00:03:55,702 --> 00:03:57,203
That's my final offer.

85
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:58,871
Going...

86
00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:00,340
Going...

87
00:04:00,373 --> 00:04:01,874
Gone.

88
00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:05,378
Going...

89
00:04:05,478 --> 00:04:07,947
Going...

90
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:10,216
Hey, Brent, I'm in the
advertising business,

91
00:04:10,383 --> 00:04:12,685
got a Hankboard in
the back of my truck.

92
00:04:12,852 --> 00:04:15,655
It's like a billboard,
but my name's not Bill.

93
00:04:15,688 --> 00:04:18,458
Hankboard.

94
00:04:18,491 --> 00:04:21,261
Anyway, you should advertise
on the back of my truck.

95
00:04:21,394 --> 00:04:25,064
Why, to keep people from
going to all the other
gas stations in town?

96
00:04:25,198 --> 00:04:26,766
Ah, you're no
better than Lacey.

97
00:04:26,866 --> 00:04:29,802
I almost had her, though.
It just came down to price.

98
00:04:29,902 --> 00:04:32,438
Really? Well, you should go
hit her up again.

99
00:04:32,505 --> 00:04:34,407
Give her a few bucks off.

100
00:04:34,474 --> 00:04:37,910
Once people see your sign
in action, you'll get
more customers.

101
00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:39,412
Hey, Wanda,

102
00:04:39,479 --> 00:04:41,247
you should advertise
on my Hankboard.

103
00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:43,883
Advertise what?

104
00:04:43,916 --> 00:04:45,918
How should I care? Just--

105
00:04:46,719 --> 00:04:48,221
Is your eye twitchin'?

106
00:04:48,254 --> 00:04:49,489
No.

107
00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:52,058
Yeah, it is. That's 'cause
you're loaded on Haywire.

108
00:04:52,258 --> 00:04:54,060
You're all zipped
up on the H.

109
00:04:54,093 --> 00:04:56,262
It's got nothin' to do
with this crap.

110
00:04:56,429 --> 00:04:59,065
I just haven't been eating
enough zinc lately.

111
00:04:59,098 --> 00:05:02,468
Just need to eat some
more broccoli,

112
00:05:02,535 --> 00:05:04,937
a few more pumpkin seeds.

113
00:05:05,738 --> 00:05:07,273
Quit gawking at me!

114
00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:11,010
All right, okay. Don't fly
into a Haywire rage.

115
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:15,782
I'm tougher
than you think.

116
00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:18,051
Just forget
about it, okay?

117
00:05:19,285 --> 00:05:21,020
Two for flinchin'.

118
00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:25,958
See? Still conscious.

119
00:05:26,025 --> 00:05:29,495
Hey, I hear Hank hit ya up
to advertise on his truck sign?

120
00:05:29,562 --> 00:05:31,931
Yes, he made me an offer
I couldn't comprehend.

121
00:05:31,964 --> 00:05:34,634
See if you can throw
the guy a bone somehow.

122
00:05:34,767 --> 00:05:37,337
This is a side of you
I haven't seen before,

123
00:05:37,470 --> 00:05:38,871
Mr. Sensitive.

124
00:05:38,971 --> 00:05:40,440
It's Dr. Sensitive,
actually.

125
00:05:40,473 --> 00:05:42,975
And I'm just lookin'
out for my best friend.

126
00:05:43,042 --> 00:05:45,978
And, yes, that is
as sad as it sounds.

127
00:05:46,579 --> 00:05:49,749
When you stop the bus,
deploy the stop sign
on the side.

128
00:05:49,782 --> 00:05:52,985
That keeps people from
passing while students
are getting on or off.

129
00:05:53,052 --> 00:05:56,489
I won't let those punks get away
with anything, not on my watch.

130
00:05:56,522 --> 00:05:58,224
The kids are pretty
well behaved.

131
00:05:58,324 --> 00:06:00,159
Kids are animals.
They need discipline.

132
00:06:00,326 --> 00:06:02,695
Otherwise it's anarchy,
like Lord of the Rings.

133
00:06:02,795 --> 00:06:05,598
You mean Lord of the Flies?
You bet I do.

134
00:06:05,765 --> 00:06:08,568
You can get 100 people to
punch me in the face--

135
00:06:08,601 --> 00:06:10,470
Oh, I can get more than 100.

136
00:06:10,503 --> 00:06:13,373
But the point is, if word
gets out that my partner

137
00:06:13,506 --> 00:06:16,342
can't back me up, it puts me
in compromised position.

138
00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:19,278
You think I can't
back you up?

139
00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:20,146
Let's just keep
this quiet.

140
00:06:20,179 --> 00:06:22,181
These things have a
way of getting out.

141
00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:23,649
Hey, Emma.

142
00:06:23,816 --> 00:06:25,218
I knocked out Davis.

143
00:06:25,351 --> 00:06:27,653
One little bump,
goodnight Sally.

144
00:06:27,687 --> 00:06:29,922
See? Now it's out there.

145
00:06:30,022 --> 00:06:33,092
Karen, leave Davis alone.
Come to my place.

146
00:06:33,126 --> 00:06:36,362
You can fertilize the garden
and clean the eaves in peace,

147
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:40,366
far away from Karen's
hurtful teasing.

148
00:06:40,533 --> 00:06:42,735
Uh, I'm good with teasing.

149
00:06:45,104 --> 00:06:48,341
would be better suited to
working around the house.

150
00:06:48,374 --> 00:06:51,844
No. Thanks for stickin'
up for me, though.

151
00:06:51,878 --> 00:06:54,380
Someone has to, Glass Jaw.

152
00:07:00,019 --> 00:07:01,854
Heya, Brent,
whatcha doin'?

153
00:07:01,888 --> 00:07:04,390
Who just tossed this
chewed gum on the floor?

154
00:07:04,524 --> 00:07:07,226
Yeah, people can be pigs
sometimes, that's for sure,

155
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:09,862
tossin' their crap all over
the place. Pigs, piggy,
piggy people, pigs.

156
00:07:09,896 --> 00:07:12,398
How many of those Haywire
drinks have you had?

157
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:15,101
Oh, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5--

158
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:16,669
Why am I counting again?

159
00:07:16,702 --> 00:07:18,171
Oh, let me do that.

160
00:07:20,406 --> 00:07:22,875
Oo-kay.

161
00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:33,419
Just got it finished.

162
00:07:33,553 --> 00:07:35,888
Paint's a little wet,
but what do ya think?

163
00:07:36,055 --> 00:07:38,424
I don't know,
"Hankboard Advertising"
seems a little small.

164
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,593
Please, Lacey,
make me an offer.

165
00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:42,795
I'll take anything
ya got, um, anything.

166
00:07:42,895 --> 00:07:44,597
Okay. I'll give ya $20.

167
00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:48,434
What? That-that's insulting,
that's a slap in the face!

168
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:51,904
No, it isn't. I could give you
an actual slap in the face

169
00:07:51,938 --> 00:07:53,439
and show you the difference.

170
00:07:53,573 --> 00:07:55,441
20's good.

171
00:07:57,210 --> 00:07:59,912
All right, listen up.

172
00:08:00,079 --> 00:08:03,015
Your regular driver, Clarence,
has gone home sick.

173
00:08:03,115 --> 00:08:05,251
I don't what you psychos
did to him,

174
00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:07,186
but they called in the cavalry.

175
00:08:07,220 --> 00:08:08,721
That's right.

176
00:08:08,754 --> 00:08:13,626
There's a new sheriff in town
and his name is "Yes, Sir."

177
00:08:13,659 --> 00:08:17,463
And he doesn't put up with any
of your punk shenanigans.

178
00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,499
Um, excuse me, Mr. Sir.

179
00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:21,834
But could you tell us
what a shenanigan is,

180
00:08:21,934 --> 00:08:23,402
so we can avoid that?

181
00:08:23,469 --> 00:08:25,738
Funny you should ask.
'Cause that's a shenanigan.

182
00:08:25,771 --> 00:08:27,440
Put your nose
against the window.

183
00:08:27,473 --> 00:08:28,875
Pardon me?

184
00:08:28,941 --> 00:08:31,143
Window. Nose. Now.

185
00:08:32,745 --> 00:08:36,716
I'm confused. Is he the
cavalry or the sheriff?

186
00:08:36,749 --> 00:08:38,451
I said I ask
the questions.

187
00:08:38,484 --> 00:08:40,486
Nose to the window.

188
00:08:53,132 --> 00:08:55,201
Hey, it's busy.

189
00:08:55,234 --> 00:08:56,168
Yeah, it's a good day.

190
00:08:56,335 --> 00:08:57,670
'Cause Hank's
billboard's workin'?

191
00:08:57,837 --> 00:09:01,207
I wouldn't go that far. I gave
him money to shut him up.

192
00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,175
His marketing style
is a little aggressive.

193
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,877
Eat at The Ruby!

194
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,414
Eat at The Ruby!

195
00:09:08,481 --> 00:09:10,016
We got a lot
of complaints.

196
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:11,517
Talk to Hank.

197
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:14,887
Oh, you hired him. I need you
to take care of this.

198
00:09:14,987 --> 00:09:18,257
Or what, you'll
collapse in a heap?

199
00:09:18,391 --> 00:09:20,693
Hey, Lacey, any ticket
we give to Hank,

200
00:09:20,726 --> 00:09:22,762
we're giving two to you, okay?

201
00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:24,931
So why don't you
take care of this?

202
00:09:25,031 --> 00:09:28,367
Oh. Sure, Karen.
It won't happen again.

203
00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:41,914
Brent, would you
be able to--

204
00:09:41,948 --> 00:09:43,549
Is Wanda inside
the cooler?

205
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,217
Yeah. She's cleaning it.

206
00:09:45,384 --> 00:09:48,421
She's got a buncha excess
energy 'cause she's jacked
up on Haywire.

207
00:09:48,487 --> 00:09:50,056
No, I'm not!

208
00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:53,392
Hmm, it gave her super hearing
too. So, what's up?

209
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:57,530
I was wondering if you'd
come by the house and help
me with some chores.

210
00:09:57,697 --> 00:10:00,066
I'll make ya a nice
four-cheese lasagne.

211
00:10:00,199 --> 00:10:01,534
Oh, geez, this is tough.

212
00:10:01,701 --> 00:10:04,236
My gluttony is fighting
with my sloth.

213
00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:09,442
Come on. Free food,
four kinds of cheese. Let's go!

214
00:10:09,475 --> 00:10:11,210
Let's just stay here.

215
00:10:11,243 --> 00:10:13,245
There's hotdogs
right next door.

216
00:10:14,981 --> 00:10:18,951
I'm just gonna stay here.
There's hotdogs right--

217
00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:20,086
I mean I have a lot
of work to do.

218
00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:23,556
I'm going to go next
door now, for work.

219
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:27,460
Wanda?

220
00:10:31,230 --> 00:10:32,865
Wanda?

221
00:10:32,898 --> 00:10:35,468
Hi, Emma. Just doing a little
re-shingling on my coffee break.

222
00:10:35,534 --> 00:10:38,504
Are you looking for Brent?
Because I haven't seen him
around in a while.

223
00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:39,839
Perfect.

224
00:10:39,939 --> 00:10:42,775
Wanda, I want you to come
and work at my place.

225
00:10:42,942 --> 00:10:45,111
Sure. Sounds like fun.
How did you--

226
00:10:45,144 --> 00:10:48,514
Never mind. Go wait in the car.
I'll be right there.

227
00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:50,483
Sure, take your time.
Can I listen to the radio?

228
00:10:50,583 --> 00:10:54,086
Actually, never mind.
I'm just gonna jog over.
See ya over there.

229
00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:06,132
Eat at The Ruby!

230
00:11:07,466 --> 00:11:09,301
Eat at the what?

231
00:11:15,608 --> 00:11:17,109
All right, let's have it.

232
00:11:17,143 --> 00:11:18,577
Have what?

233
00:11:18,611 --> 00:11:20,579
The booze.
What's booze?

234
00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:23,716
The stuff they warned us
about in Church Group.

235
00:11:23,749 --> 00:11:26,352
Oh, don't give me the old church
mouse and bookworm routine.

236
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,020
I've seen them all before.

237
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:31,590
Honest, Mr. Leroy, we don't have
any liquor or anything bad.

238
00:11:31,624 --> 00:11:34,293
Fine. Then I'll just take this.

239
00:11:34,326 --> 00:11:35,194
That's my homework.

240
00:11:35,227 --> 00:11:37,997
Then do it at home.
No reading on the bus.

241
00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:40,399
God loves you.

242
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:43,335
You're damn right he does.

243
00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:51,544
Hey, lotsa people.

244
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:53,512
Guess ya got the
Hankboard to thank.

245
00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:56,415
I admit there may be some
coincidental benefit.

246
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,584
But you can't drive
around like some lunatic,

247
00:11:58,651 --> 00:12:01,020
not with my business
in huge letters--

248
00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:04,056
moderately sized letters--
emblazoned across your truck.

249
00:12:04,156 --> 00:12:07,626
People can't read what
they can't see. I make
them see my truck.

250
00:12:07,660 --> 00:12:09,662
Hank, you're making
people mad at me.

251
00:12:09,695 --> 00:12:13,766
The place is packed. Trust me.
This is what I do for a living.

252
00:12:13,866 --> 00:12:15,434
Yeah, since 10 a.m.

253
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:19,238
You run your business your way,
I'll run my business my way.

254
00:12:19,371 --> 00:12:22,208
Do you have any advice
now, Dr. Sensitive?

255
00:12:22,241 --> 00:12:24,477
Actually, yes.

256
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,412
LACEY:
Hank Yarbo is an
independent contractor

257
00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:30,683
and The Ruby Café is not
liable for his actions.

258
00:12:30,716 --> 00:12:32,451
Well, yeah,
that's the idea.

259
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,687
But it might be
a little wordy.

260
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:42,928
Where were you?

261
00:12:43,095 --> 00:12:44,897
Oh, I just went for a run,

262
00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:50,469
you know, through some
backyards, over some fences.

263
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:52,104
Were you chasin' a suspect?

264
00:12:52,138 --> 00:12:53,606
No.

265
00:12:53,639 --> 00:12:55,741
You were doin' police work
on your own

266
00:12:55,875 --> 00:12:57,977
because you think
I can't back you up.

267
00:12:58,110 --> 00:13:01,080
You let Lacey push
you around--Lacey!

268
00:13:01,147 --> 00:13:03,716
I was gettin' ready to
make my next move

269
00:13:03,749 --> 00:13:05,251
before you stepped in.

270
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:06,852
What was your
move gonna be?

271
00:13:06,919 --> 00:13:08,454
I don't know.

272
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:11,624
Arm bar, nightstick to the
knees, whatever it took.

273
00:13:11,657 --> 00:13:13,926
Hey, Wanda, when you're
done in the cooler,

274
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,629
you could do the floors in
the bathroom, you know,

275
00:13:16,662 --> 00:13:19,431
if you're still not being
affected by your energy drink.

276
00:13:20,733 --> 00:13:22,401
Wanda?

277
00:13:22,434 --> 00:13:24,236
Hey, that's a nice ladder.
What is it, aluminium?

278
00:13:24,270 --> 00:13:26,472
It probably is, because there
aren't that many metals that

279
00:13:26,505 --> 00:13:29,708
are this strong and this light.
Nobody uses wood anymore.
Hey, that's a nice shirt.

280
00:13:29,742 --> 00:13:32,144
Yeah. Well, the eavestrough is--

281
00:13:36,148 --> 00:13:37,917
This title's misleading.

282
00:13:37,983 --> 00:13:40,319
Are they gonna kill a
mockingbird or not?

283
00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:44,323
Quit your honkin'!

284
00:13:44,423 --> 00:13:46,759
When I'm stopped,
you're stopped!

285
00:13:46,792 --> 00:13:48,794
I don't make the rules!

286
00:13:48,961 --> 00:13:51,964
Eat at The Ruby!

287
00:13:51,997 --> 00:13:53,966
Hank is not my fault!

288
00:13:59,705 --> 00:14:02,174
You're a good digger.

289
00:14:03,843 --> 00:14:06,979
Well, keep at it.
I'll be inside.

290
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:15,454
Yo, Zippy, time to
get back to your job.

291
00:14:15,487 --> 00:14:17,690
It's a nice day, Brent.
I like working outside.

292
00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:19,592
The sun is shining and
the birds are singing

293
00:14:19,692 --> 00:14:21,594
and the sky is bleeding
and the grass is screaming.

294
00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:23,229
I wanna stay here.

295
00:14:23,329 --> 00:14:26,365
Okay. Well, I guess I'll just
go back to Corner Gas,

296
00:14:26,465 --> 00:14:29,401
you know, that place that's
full of Haywire.

297
00:14:29,468 --> 00:14:33,205
This is nice in here. You
spilled some toothpicks, 234.

298
00:14:33,339 --> 00:14:37,176
I counted them.
Let's go. Come on!

299
00:14:37,209 --> 00:14:41,013
It could use
some pictures, too.

300
00:14:41,180 --> 00:14:44,483
Mr. Leroy, you can't just stay
parked out here all day.

301
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:46,719
We have to get home.

302
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:49,088
Who's drivin' this bus?

303
00:14:49,221 --> 00:14:50,990
No one right now.

304
00:14:51,023 --> 00:14:53,392
Oh, smart mouth.
Nose to the window.

305
00:14:53,492 --> 00:14:55,561
If you don't get us
home right now,

306
00:14:55,728 --> 00:14:57,563
I'm going to write
a stern letter.

307
00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:59,398
We will all write
stern letters.

308
00:14:59,531 --> 00:15:02,268
Oh, really? How are ya gonna
write letters

309
00:15:02,301 --> 00:15:03,702
if I confiscate your pens?

310
00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:07,039
Everyone, hand over your
pens and pencils, right now.

311
00:15:07,072 --> 00:15:09,608
New rule: no writing on the bus.

312
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:13,212
He can take our pens,
but he can't crush our spirits.

313
00:15:13,245 --> 00:15:15,881
Spirits? I knew you had booze.

314
00:15:16,015 --> 00:15:18,517
We don't have any booze!
Enough is enough!

315
00:15:20,252 --> 00:15:22,554
Sit t down! Sit down!

316
00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:25,357
I'll-I'll-I'll-I'll
give ya your pens back!

317
00:15:30,329 --> 00:15:32,298
D.R.P.D.

318
00:15:33,632 --> 00:15:35,267
I'll be right there.

319
00:15:36,468 --> 00:15:38,971
You'll be right where?
Where will you be?

320
00:15:39,004 --> 00:15:41,140
Oh, just taking care
of some, uh,

321
00:15:41,173 --> 00:15:44,076
you know, personal stuff,

322
00:15:44,176 --> 00:15:47,980
with my cousin, who's in town
for some family things.

323
00:15:48,013 --> 00:15:49,815
And, uh, where's
the riot gear?

324
00:15:49,982 --> 00:15:51,750
In the trunk.

325
00:15:52,484 --> 00:15:54,787
But this better
not be a call.

326
00:15:59,258 --> 00:16:01,927
You can't let Mom manipulate
ya like that.

327
00:16:02,027 --> 00:16:03,896
She's taking advantage
of your condition.

328
00:16:04,029 --> 00:16:05,798
Hey, could you clean
the bathrooms?

329
00:16:05,831 --> 00:16:07,700
I'm feeling a little wiped.

330
00:16:07,766 --> 00:16:10,402
Uh-oh. You're crashing.
I saw this on Mod Squad.

331
00:16:10,502 --> 00:16:11,904
Don't go to sleep!

332
00:16:12,037 --> 00:16:13,505
I'm just resting my eyes.

333
00:16:13,672 --> 00:16:15,174
Stay with me!

334
00:16:15,207 --> 00:16:16,175
Ooo!

335
00:16:16,208 --> 00:16:18,811
Eat at The Ruby!

336
00:16:18,844 --> 00:16:21,313
He's not my fault!

337
00:16:21,347 --> 00:16:22,815
Eat at The Ruby!

338
00:16:22,848 --> 00:16:24,483
He's not my fault!

339
00:16:24,516 --> 00:16:26,051
Eat at The Ruby!

340
00:16:27,353 --> 00:16:30,222
Karen! Thank God!
Get out your gun.

341
00:16:30,289 --> 00:16:32,224
Did you bring that
pepper spray stuff?

342
00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:33,726
What happened, here?

343
00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:37,196
How am I supposed to know?
I was just drivin' the bus.

344
00:16:37,229 --> 00:16:40,499
Wow, this is surprising.
Normally these kids are
really well behaved.

345
00:16:40,532 --> 00:16:42,267
That one's in
a church group.

346
00:16:42,368 --> 00:16:43,836
Well, they've all gone nuts.

347
00:16:43,869 --> 00:16:46,205
It's like Lord of the Dance
in here.

348
00:16:46,238 --> 00:16:49,074
Everybody take your seats!
I'm Officer Pelly!

349
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:51,744
Ah-hah! I knew this
was police business.

350
00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:53,746
Davis, I can take
care of this.

351
00:16:53,779 --> 00:16:56,749
Why don't you just go back
to the station and do--

352
00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:02,554
Oopsy.

353
00:17:04,723 --> 00:17:07,459
Okay, I give up. I can't chase
you around all day.

354
00:17:07,559 --> 00:17:10,996
I want to get back to The Ruby
and have something to eat.

355
00:17:11,163 --> 00:17:12,898
There's the power of
advertising, right there.

356
00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:16,535
I mean you can sell any kinda
crap with a well placed ad.

357
00:17:16,568 --> 00:17:20,272
ANNOUNCER:
Season four of Corner Gas
now available on DVD.

358
00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:23,475
Okay, look, I just want you to
stop driving around, okay?

359
00:17:23,575 --> 00:17:25,144
I got my money's worth.

360
00:17:25,277 --> 00:17:26,779
Fine.

361
00:17:26,845 --> 00:17:29,815
Hey, you want me to
advertise that I'm not
advertising anymore?

362
00:17:29,882 --> 00:17:31,283
No!

363
00:17:33,285 --> 00:17:35,554
Okay, come on. You're
gonna be all right.

364
00:17:35,587 --> 00:17:37,823
Just relax. Here we go.

365
00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,792
You have a seat, right here,

366
00:17:39,858 --> 00:17:42,094
and I'll get you
a can of Haywire.

367
00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:47,566
Damn! Well played, Mother.

368
00:17:47,599 --> 00:17:49,301
I want Wanda back.

369
00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:51,270
Well, of course you do.

370
00:17:51,303 --> 00:17:53,972
She's, uh, a human dynamo.

371
00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:57,276
Okay, maybe we can
still make a deal.

372
00:17:57,309 --> 00:17:58,844
Did the kids settle down?

373
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:01,914
Oh, yeah. Once they
realized they knocked
out a police officer,

374
00:18:01,947 --> 00:18:05,284
they all started cryin'
and prayin'. Good kids.

375
00:18:05,317 --> 00:18:08,020
You must be loving this.
I take no satisfaction.

376
00:18:08,153 --> 00:18:11,323
I simply wanted you to
understand that anyone
can get knocked out.

377
00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:12,925
There's not anyone--

378
00:18:16,628 --> 00:18:18,130
Oopsy.

379
00:18:18,163 --> 00:18:20,866
Here it is, still warm.

380
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:23,402
Mmm-mmm-mmm,
four-cheese lasagne.

381
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:25,504
Actually, it's five.
Holy crud!

382
00:18:25,637 --> 00:18:28,474
You didn't just use one of
the cheeses twice, did ya?

383
00:18:28,607 --> 00:18:30,409
Five different cheeses.

384
00:18:30,476 --> 00:18:32,311
Now, where's Wanda?

385
00:18:32,344 --> 00:18:36,181
Oh, she's in the yard already,
you know, just flat out.

386
00:18:36,315 --> 00:18:37,683
Okay, see ya.

387
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,651
That sneaky--

388
00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:43,355
Don't worry, Wanda,

389
00:18:43,388 --> 00:18:46,325
I have a little surprise
for ya in the fridge.

390
00:18:49,661 --> 00:18:53,866
Oh, I needed that,
whatever it was.

391
00:18:59,671 --> 00:19:01,206
That's 10 dollars worth.

392
00:19:01,940 --> 00:19:03,542
Thanks.

393
00:19:03,675 --> 00:19:06,211
Man, fill 'er up again.

394
00:19:06,245 --> 00:19:10,382
A guy sure can burn up a lotta
gas drivin' around town all day.

395
00:19:10,415 --> 00:19:11,850
Tell me about it.

396
00:19:11,884 --> 00:19:15,020
I was only out there for
an hour and I spent $10--

397
00:19:15,187 --> 00:19:16,622
Wait a minute.

398
00:19:16,655 --> 00:19:19,892
Yep, what can ya do?
Crazy world, crazy times.
Nice weather, though.

399
00:19:19,925 --> 00:19:22,227
You set this whole thing up.
Admit it.

400
00:19:22,261 --> 00:19:25,030
I'm not admitting anything,
and you can't make me.

401
00:19:25,197 --> 00:19:25,998
Hmm.

402
00:19:26,198 --> 00:19:28,400
Ow! All right, don't flick me!

403
00:19:28,433 --> 00:19:31,503
Fine, I set it up,
and it was brilliant.

404
00:19:31,537 --> 00:19:34,973
I almost had her, though. It
just came down to the price.

405
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:36,508
Really?

406
00:19:36,542 --> 00:19:39,478
When I heard Hank almost had
you onboard his crazy scheme,

407
00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:40,913
I saw the potential
immediately.

408
00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:43,715
I sent everybody I could
over to your place.

409
00:19:45,751 --> 00:19:48,153
And you kept Hank's truck
rollin' all day long.

410
00:19:48,253 --> 00:19:50,522
Ka ching, ka ching,
ka ching.

411
00:19:50,556 --> 00:19:52,758
I even had you drivin'
around telling people

412
00:19:52,791 --> 00:19:54,960
you weren't responsible for
him drivin' around.

413
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:57,729
Hank is not my fault!

414
00:19:57,763 --> 00:20:02,100
All in all, it meant mucho
dimayo for the evil genius, me.

415
00:20:02,267 --> 00:20:04,336
Dimayo means May, Genius.

416
00:20:04,436 --> 00:20:07,239
And for the record, I paid
Hank $20, you $10,

417
00:20:07,272 --> 00:20:10,075
and with all the extra
traffic, I came out with

418
00:20:10,108 --> 00:20:15,714
a profit of over $400, which
means mucho dinero for me.

419
00:20:15,747 --> 00:20:18,150
De Niro's an actor,
Genius.

420
00:20:18,283 --> 00:20:20,619
And you're both overlooking
one little thing.

421
00:20:20,752 --> 00:20:23,722
I drove around town all day
and made 20 bucks.

422
00:20:23,755 --> 00:20:25,991
Eat at The Ruby!

423
00:20:26,024 --> 00:20:29,328
And all I had to do was
pay Brent, pay Brent...

424
00:20:29,461 --> 00:20:31,330
pay Brent...

425
00:20:31,463 --> 00:20:33,465
pay Brent--

426
00:20:33,532 --> 00:20:34,700
Wait.

427
00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,469
Aw, man, that didn't work
out well for me at all.

428
00:20:37,502 --> 00:20:38,971
What a rip!

429
00:20:39,071 --> 00:20:40,472
Oh, well.

430
00:20:40,572 --> 00:20:43,175
Let's go to The Ruby
and get somethin' to eat.

431
00:20:43,308 --> 00:20:45,978
Damn, it still works!

432
00:20:50,649 --> 00:20:52,784
Neat and tidy, that's
the way to do it.

433
00:20:52,884 --> 00:20:54,653
And keep the shelves
stocked at the front.

434
00:20:54,753 --> 00:20:57,623
That's how I used to do it
and that's how you should do it.

435
00:20:57,656 --> 00:21:00,993
Please take him back. Don't you
have chores he can do at home?

436
00:21:01,159 --> 00:21:02,527
Nope. He's finished them all.

437
00:21:02,661 --> 00:21:05,931
He's yours for as long as
a can of that stuff lasts.

438
00:21:08,433 --> 00:21:10,769
I feel like I'm forgetting
something.

439
00:21:13,805 --> 00:21:16,675
Just a couple more minutes.

440
00:21:19,811 --> 00:21:23,649
Captioning by VerticalSync
www.verticalsync.com

441
00:21:23,682 --> 00:21:26,785
♪ I don't know the same things
you don't know ♪

442
00:21:30,689 --> 00:21:35,294
♪ I don't know
I just don't know ♪

443
00:21:40,332 --> 00:21:44,036
♪ It's a great big place ♪

444
00:21:44,202 --> 00:21:47,439
♪ full of nothin' but space ♪

445
00:21:47,472 --> 00:21:49,808
♪ and it's my happy place ♪

446
00:21:49,841 --> 00:21:53,078
♪ I don't know
Yes you do ♪

447
00:21:53,211 --> 00:21:57,215
♪ You just won't admit it ♪

448
00:21:57,282 --> 00:22:00,719
Want to have a gas online?
Visit us at cornergas.com

449
00:22:02,888 --> 00:22:05,757
♪ I don't know ♪

450
00:22:05,824 --> 00:22:09,227
♪ I just don't know ♪♪